Oh my goodness…..the card is heart wrenching just to look at! Nine of Swords is a card that brings up the question, “Is what is happening as bad as it FEELS, or am I contributing to the unrest, dis-ease, and anxiety, which is felt within? Is it really so bad?” Look honestly to see if what you think is causing you pain, or if the actual experience that you are presently in is no longer good for you. Making this distinction will clear up a lot of unnecessary pain. What is a REAL concern and what is a figment of the imagination? The Nine of Swords is indicating there is some great confusion that is unsure of what is imagination and what is really happening.
Nine of Swords addresses if any fears or expectations are being held on to which are disturbing the present moment beauty of all that is in front of you? Are you grateful for what you have, or always wanting more? As we investigate this sometimes we can see that perhaps we are putting too much pressure on ourselves and on life. Trying to make something one way instead of seeing the intrinsic beauty of how it is. As we create expectations on life we put major stress on ourself and life around us that creates a block for life to move naturally, and instead to force it in the way we think it should be. Instead of being one with the grand unfolding we say “NO, I think it should be going this way!” Nine of Swords asks us should it REALLY be going the way you think it should go? OR, is life happening exactly as it should be? There is a difference between going with the flow as a dead fish and accepting anything that comes and going with the flow of lifes vibrancy, VERY different. Nine of Swords asks to discern in a way that is more objective or all encompassing. Take a step back to see a broader perspective of the present situation. Spend some time alone and inquire if you going with a healthy flow or one that is unhealthy for you? Is life revealing or presenting something new and exciting that may be covered by a fear of swimming into the unknown? Swimming in uncharted waters can always be a bit scary, but believing in the fear will guide us away from the magic that is constantly revealing itself to us.
This card can arise when negative self talk is perpetual, muddying up the entire experience and causing great confusion within. We cannot and will not always know what is the next best step to make or direction to move in. As we take the time to relax a bit and breath we can discover space within our being to see clearly instead of believing immediately the negative, internal monologue playing out. If you have made it to this moment and you are reading this, things can’t be that bad. You have your vision to see, your mind to think, your heart to feel. Up until now, hopefully, you have become more wise through experience. You have made mistakes and hopefully learned what you would not like to do again. You have learned to be more in tune with the entirety of your being which allows you to be connected with your inner intuitive guide as well as your logical mind. You have all the tools you need to get through any conflict that arises.
The invitation with such a gnarly card is to take time to meditate or take a walk in the park. To do whatever it is that puts YOU in a deep connection with yourself and all of life. Allowing the discontent , confusion, anger, or whatever negative self talk is present to leave your body. From this space ask “How have I engaged with life up until now? What ways do I wish to live, and what ways do I wish to never to tread again?” This is a good time to contemplate and reflect. First allowing yourself to truly come to the space of internal rest before even getting into these questions. We ALL have the capacity to ask ourselves these questions from an undivided mind/heart space, but we also must give ourselves the permission to take our time and calm down. One may not be able to do this at the drop of a hat. Maybe it will take one hour, 2 days, a few weeks, or a month to simply relax. It really depends on how entrenched one has been in the state they are in. However long it takes, self judgement in a self destructive way will not work here. Gentleness, Compassion, and Love will be most powerful in shifting gears. Turning to rest in your being allows the harshness to fall away. As this occurs the space opens for one to question themselves, their experience, what is true within the experience and what has been imagined to be true. It is MUCH easier to do this when we aren’t asking these things from an already confused, angry, or fearful state. This can cause even more confusion on top of confusion. It is more than okay to take all the time one needs to nurture, love, and relax into the being before starting to ask questions. It is very different for each human being how to navigate the waters of life. Trust your own path and what you have experienced up until now. This will always be your greatest teacher. The more faith and trust one has within oneself the stronger one will be inside to move with great ease.